On one hand, this felt like the second setup episode in a row. On the other hand, what a setup episode! And theres every indication that the Battle of Winterfell, which is the thing being so painstakingly set up here, will be a worthy climax for the entire Game of Thrones saga. So lets not hurry our favorite characters off to their very likely deaths at the hands of the White Walkers but rather savor each remaining moment we have with them. Thats certainly what theyre trying to do, even as they deal with some pretty stressful shit.
For starters, Jaime needs to find a way to not be killed by his northern hosts, despite having given just about everyone present a reason to want him dead. It doesnt help that he refuses to apologize, since “everything I did was for my house and my family.” And its especially inconvenient that the message hes come to deliver—that Cersei has amassed 20,000 troops in Kings Landing with the goal of polishing off whoever survives the Army of the Dead—is exactly the kind of Lannister trickery that makes Daenerys wonder why she ever trusted Tyrion in the first place. For a minute, it looks like Dany and Sansa are finally going to bond over Jaimes flaming flesh, but then up stands Lady Brienne of Tarth. She owes her life to Jaime, and Sansa owes her life to Brienne, so that changes the equation. Looking a bit miffed—and really, it has been quite a while since shes had the chance to feed a traitor to her dragons—Daenerys looks to Jon Snow, whose mind is clearly a million miles away, in Lyanna Stark and Rhaegar Targaryens secret love nest specifically. He basically says we need all the warriors we can get, and thats that. Jaime is welcomed into the fold—and wisely calls Daenerys “Your Grace” as he accepts her largesse.
Unable to take her rage out on Jaime, Daenerys then turns to the other brother. How could Tyrion have fallen for Cerseis lie? Is he a traitor or a fool? This is as low as weve seen Tyrion in a while, but its encouraging to see how he handles it. The old Tyrion would have downed a few bottles of wine and disappeared into a brothel. This one doesnt give up so easily. As Jorah points out when he visits Daenerys to magnanimously defend him, Tyrion owns his mistakes and learns from them. And when Jaime offers that Tyrion always has the option of returning to whoremongering, he replies that in fact he doesnt. “The perils of self-betterment.” Hey, better late than never!
Is it me or did they make an extra effort to show off Gendrys glistening upper chest muscles in this episode? I guess that should have been our first indication that he and Arya were headed for a pre-apocalyptic love-making session. I really had no idea how many lovers Gendry was going to confess to when pressed by Arya, but three seemed like an excellent number. Not an incel, but hardly a playboy either. Meanwhile, I think Gendry probably saw Arya—who, lets face it, was just a kid when they first met—in a new light after she said all that intense stuff about death while flinging three knives into a single spot on a wall. Our little girl is all growed up! In the end, Im sure it was convenient for Arya to use the whole “lets make love tonight for tomorrow we die” excuse, but this coupling has been a long time coming, and I have every reason to believe theyll keep it up if they make it through the next episode. And from the looks of that weapon he forged for her, I think Arya stands a better chance than most.
Last week, I speculated about how forgiving Bran would be toward Jaime. Turns out pretty damn forgiving! His galaxy-brain thing is not an act, and hes glad he turned into the Three-Eyed Raven because thats the only reason these humans have a chance in hell of defeating the Nights King. When Jaime asks Bran why he didnt snitch, Bran says, “You wouldnt have been able to help us in this fight if Id let them murder you first.” Lannister that he is, Jaime then wants to know if Bran is going to rat him out afterwards. “How do you know there is an afterwards?” is Brans fairly alarming response. Even the Three-Eyed Raven is not counting on a victory here.
Shall we continue to follow Jaime on his reunion tour? First up is Tyrion. They talk about Cersei, and how she actually is pregnant. And then Tyrion fantasizes about becoming a wight, traveling to Kings Landing, and ripping her apart. Is there anything more heartwarming than brotherly love? Little do either of these guys know that Bronn is on his way to theoretically kill off whichever of them doesnt fall to the White Walkers.
Next up is Brienne! Jaime sees her watching Podrick train and then confuses her by not insulting her in the first five seconds of their conversation. So what does he want? Actually, he wants to fight under her command, on the left flank. Brienne likes her chances, high ground and all. But when Jaime tells her this, shes stunned into silence. Maybe the Kingslayer is a redeemable human being after all!
After urging his Khaleesi to take it easy on Tyrion, Jorah says he has one more piece of advice. Next thing we see is Dany paying a peacemaking visit to Sansa. After softening Sansa up with some boilerplate womens-solidarity stuff, she asks: why cant we get along? Sansa admits that shes worried that Dany is using Jons feelings to manipulate him. Dany replies, rightly, that shes the one who put her throne-conquest plans on hold to post up in the frozen north fighting an impossible battle against a bunch of uncontrollable zombies. “Tell me who manipulated whom?”
That causes Sansa to lighten up a bit, and she apologizes for not thanking Daenerys for her support upon her arrival. Now their hands are touching, and theyre making jokes about Jons height. Could it be that these two are destined to be friends? But then Sansa presses the point about the Norths independence. She has seen enough of Kings Landing to know that she never wants to be at the mercy of any occupant of the Iron Throne again. Whats the plan there? And just like that, Danys face ices back up and their hands come apart. And then theyre interrupted by the news that Theon is back.
You know, Alfie Allen, the actor who plays Theon, has had to endure a lot. Humiliation after humiliation. Getting kicked in the crotch and not feeling it is one of the better things to have happened to his character. So is that why I suddenly found myself weeping on the couch when Sansa, whom he helped spring from the evil clutches of Ramsay Snow, gave him a hug worthy of a heros welcome? There must be some explanation, because I really hadnt guessed until that moment how invested I am in this character.
Who will fight, and who will hide in the crypt? Thats one of the stressful life-and-death questions everyones dealing with in this episode. Able-bodied men are fighting, like it or not. Little girls are a different matter. Gilly and Ser Davos manage to persuade one girl whose scarred face reminds them of dearly departed Shireen Baratheon to choose the crypt, under the auspices of defending it, but Jorah cant get his cousin Lyanna Mormont to hide down there, try as he may. It looks like Tyrion will stay in the crypt, per Danys orders, in order to protect his all-important brain for future use. And its still a little unclear where Samwell Tarly is going to spend the battle. On the one hand, he really likes reminding everyone about the White Walker and Thenns hes killed. On the other hand, he cant lift his fathers sword, Heartsbane, so he overcomes his anger about having his father and brother incinerated by the Khaleesi and gives it to Jorah—in honor of Jorahs estranged father, Lord Commander Jeor “The Old Bear” Mormont, who mentored Sam at Castle Black.
Its a safe bet Tormund wont be hiding in the crypt. He and the rest of the scouting party are back from Last Heath, and they have some ominous news: the dead are marching south and will be at Winterfell before dawn. A war council is called, and Jon gives a stirring speech before laying out the strategy. They cant win in a straight-up battle, so theyll have to think of something clever. Bran knows what to do. The Night King wants to kill Bran because hes the repository of human memory, so Bran will act as bait to lure him to a place where he can be destroyed. And once he goes, the rest of the zombies will fall with him.
Is this convincing? Not especially, and no amount of Sams dorm-room philosophizing about how “death is forgetting” will solve that. But its fine! We need a game plan, and now we have one. Onward! And out marches Jon, with nary a lustful glance at Daenerys. “Wheres my kiss before the war?” she has to be wondering.
Missandei is having a perfectly miserable time in the North. Its not just the cold, the bad clothes, and the ugly accents, but even the little kids are racist af! I didnt even know racism was a thing in Westeros, but I guess it makes sense—every other horrible aspect of humanity is amply represented here. No wonder she and Grey Worm are eager to get the hell out of here and back to the beach.
Hey! Did you notice Ghost, Jons direwolf, in the scene where Sam nags him about telling Daenerys the secret of his birth? Anyway, hes there, which hopefully means well see much more of him next episode. Sam, Jon, and Eddison Tollett are the last of the Nights Watch, and its nice to see them enjoy this bittersweet moment together on the eve of insanity.
Tyrion, naturally, is following the classic imperative to drink before the war, and hes roping in whoever he can find: Jaime, Ser Davos, Tormund, Lady Brienne of Tarth, Podrick. Dont bother sleeping, guys, or monitoring your alcohol intake. Adrenaline is going to solve all that once the first White Walkers materialize on the horizon. And you cant stay completely sober while listening to a story like the one Tormund tells about being suckled at the breast of a lady giant.
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Vanity Fair
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